Monday, September 12, 2011
As I come to you this evening, there is no title(yet) for this post. As you know most of the time that I write, it stems from my own personal experiences as well as the experiences of family, friends and associates. The video below has so much meaning to many individuals and if you're familiar with Luther Vandross, then you know that no one can do it like he did. I watched the 10 minute and few seconds video 10 times (no joke). This basically means I was entrapped with headphones on for close to an hour with the same song playing. Yes, I'm a big fan of the artist, yet the meaning of this song hit home for an associate of mine. Therefore, it was extremely important for me to inhale and understand what Mr. Vandross was saying to the world.
When I was 21 years of age, it was a normal activity for me to club hop every Friday, Saturday, Sunday and sometimes Monday nights. I wasn't out looking for a mate, I was simply enjoying the fact that I was legally old enough to drink and didn't have a curfew. I recall dragging myself in to work at the beginning of most weeks, yet, always looked forward to Friday afternoon at 5pm. I couldn't wait to get home to rest up, grab my black catsuit or form fitting dress and hit the town. We traveled all over from the city to the suburbs, flirting, dancing, drinking and having the time of our lives. I have always been an analytical person and made a clear analysis of the older gentlemen that always hung out in he dark corners. They usually sit at the end of th bar and have a good rapport with all the bartenders. You know them! More than likely they are dressed in a suit accompanied with a stylish hat and are usually between the ages of 60 - death. Back in those days, I didn't pay them much attention.....then I had a conversation with one. His name was Jimmie. Our eyes had met at several functions, yet we never spoke. I was at the bar summoning my favorite cocktail and the waitress advised me that Mr. Jimmie has purchased my drink for me. It's odd that I along with everyone else in the place knew his name. I walked over to him and kindly thanked him for his gesture and felt drawn to talk to this man. He wasn't the type that was shaking loose change in his pocket. Those are the older dudes I steered away from, I could spot them a mile away. They usually were at the bars looking for a young tender to clean their homes in lingerie and pounce on their dick whenever it managed to get hard. Jimmie had knowledge and being that my mind was a sponge....I listened....intently.
"Don' get trapped in this club scene too long young lady! You will wake up one day and be like me!" I didn't have to ask him what he meant, the look on my inquistive face asked all the questions that night. Jimmie was like I was when he was 21. He was the party animal dancing the night away...like I was. He had a loyal woman at home waiting for him to arrive with the stinch of liquor on his breath and another woman's perfume on his shirt. He took her for granted and we all know how the rest of this story goes. Eventually, Jimmies woman had her "Nuff" and she left him after 9 years of stability. In the beginning Jimmie told me he thought it was a good thing, says he had a different woman every night at his place, but as time went on, he realized he missed her. By the time he put his ego to the side, his lady had found another man and had been married for 3 years. Jimmie then went on to say that eventually people (some) will get tired of the club scene and settle down with someone they love, but for him, he lost his true love to another man based upon his own selfishness. He soon found himself going home to a dark quiet house. There was no one to welcome him or let alone argue with him. "It's the simple stuff, I miss" he said. His reason for coming into the bar at 60 years of age was just for the noise itself. "You can only talk to yourself for so long before the doctors rule you clinically insane." I smiled at him, grabbed his hand and kissed him on his cheek.
I talk to Jimmie at least once a week to make sure he is still breathing. He has since moved to Florida and has found a new love of golfing, no longer hangs out in the club (he's 80 now) and has made some wonderful friends in his newfound home. The lesson that he taught me that evening has stuck with me throughout my adult years. Here is what I learned: It doesn't matter if you're young, old, male, female or undecided. We all have a need to belong to something, it can be an organization, a school or a person. Which ever way it is done, we all need human interaction and there is nothing like the human interaction that is patiently waiting for your return home but most importantly remember that everything and everyone has an expiration date.